Kathy
Hi, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Coping.
And in today's episode, we're continuing our discussion of calling, specifically how to recognize what we're going to call "calling clues" that can help us to discover it.
Kathy
Yeah, that's right. So finding a calling can be like trying to solve a mystery, but there's actually some key clues that can guide us along that path to finding our calling.
Kathy
I know that you love a good mystery and so do I, so today we're going to discover some of these clues and how they can help us uncover our purpose and our passion. Let's get started.
Kathy
So, like we said, discovering our calling can be challenging, but there's actually three clues that can help us in that pursuit.
Kathy
That's right. Let's start with the first clue and they all begin with C's. So this first one is campaign. With campaigning, we think about the people, causes, or issues that you feel strongly about, that you would like to advocate for. What would you campaign for?
You are the campaigner on the Myers-Briggs, the ENFP. What gets you fired up?
Kathy
What gets me fired up? Um, I would say supporting people in their spiritual wellness.
I get really fired up talking about palliative care, end of life care, especially. I joke with my team at the hospital. Don't ask me about palliative care. If you only have five minutes, because I'm going to talk your ear off, especially as it relates to advanced care planning and advanced directives, filling out posts, that, that sort of conversation really gets me fired up because I feel really passionate about, uh, making sure we know our decisions, we communicate our decisions, and we have a community that can follow through on those wishes. If we're not able to do that ourselves, that's what I get fired up about. I think you can tell.
Kathy
And I remember years ago, Brene Brown in "Gifts of Imperfection" talks about how she wanted to start a global conversation. And it was about shame and resilience.
And that's what led her to find the work that she now does. And so I think campaigning can also be, if you wanted to start a global conversation about something, what would the topic be? That's another way of looking at the campaigning, because sometimes it's not a cause. It's something, like you said, that you often want to talk about end of life issues, which I think is really funny. But it is something that you're passionate about.
Kevin
Why is it funny?
Kathy
Funny, odd, funny.
Kevin
Kinda like me.
Kathy
So, that you can ask yourself, what would you want to start a global conversation about? And I think that that sometimes, what do you want everybody to start talking about?
That's another way of looking at campaigning.
Kevin
Yeah, exactly. And, you know, sometimes your calling can be connected to another campaign that's unfolding, some social justice movement, something within society like education, health care, the environment. And you can throw your energy and power into helping that or something that you feel personally passionate about that nobody's talking about and you bring awareness to. It can be really anything.
It can be niche. It can be big. You can be connected to other people. It really comes down to what would you campaign for? What do you feel like would be worth your time and energy doing that?
Kathy
And that brings us to our second clue, which is related, obviously, it's curiosity. So this is that question of what fascinates you, what motivates you, what are you curious about learning more about in the world?
And it can be, again, like you said, very specific. You want to learn about the history of great white sharks, I don't know. Or it could be something like right now, people who are food insecure, you know, you're fascinated about like, why is that happening in 2025 that some people don't have enough food on their tables, especially in this country?
Kevin
So our encouragement would be to pay attention to the books that you're reading, the podcasts that you listen to, the conversations that you're engaging in. All of those are those many clues that can reveal what you are naturally curious about, what you would spend your entire day researching.
Those can be the clues to reveal what you are naturally curious about.
Kathy
And for you, Kevin, it was about end-of-life issues. Is that a surprise to you that that's what you became curious about, or were you always curious about that when you were younger?
Kevin
I have no idea why that is where I felt led I think my curiosity around death and decision making stems from my eagerness to talk about the things that nobody wants to talk about and death became that thing that I felt comfortable bearing witness to and supporting people in and then helping those that are living to make decisions that will positively impact the way that they die and so it it simply is because within our society not very many of us take time to think about it not very many of us communicate what our wishes are if we know what they are and very few of us write those wishes down have it witnessed or notarized and give it to our our medical team so that they know what our wishes are and so I feel especially passionate about sharing the wisdom that I've gained from experience within my work so that others might benefit from it and so I wonder for you what what is that curiosity that's leading you to do the work that you do today
Kathy
Well, I would say I don't consider myself a curious person. I think you might disagree, but I don't think of myself as I think that you are. I be I am always curious about things that will help other people. And so the books that I read are very wide ranging on various topics, because I think I'm I think this is a good point.
I hadn't thought about this. I'm generally very curious about how people behave and move in the world, how they make decisions and their history.
So I think I'm just generally curious about people in general. So I think I have not thought about that ever before till this conversation.
Kevin
I would even say as I'm thinking about it that curiosity is like active dreaming where you are supplying yourself with information that you're looking up to fill in the gaps of your imagination and I think that leads us really well into this third clue of calling this third clue of helping us identify our calling and that's childhood say a little bit more about this clue
Kathy
Yeah, so we've all heard that question, what do you want to be when you grow up? And some people have followed that. Some people have left it way in the dust because maybe their childhoods were difficult, hard, traumatic, which is completely understandable. But I would say for all of us, there were probably some clues in childhood about what we were going to do in the world. We just have to go back, remember it, and be emboldened to take some steps towards that.
There are plenty of stories, especially of very famous people who had childhood loves that maybe they were in a career and then they left to go back to what they loved doing in childhood. And I think we can take a page out of their notebooks because we wonder how they have made it so big in the world. I would venture to say, even if I went on an investigative interviewing process of people who are famous and I said, hey, were there clues in your childhood of the work you're doing now? I'd venture to say a majority of people would point to those. So why wouldn't we do the same?
Kevin
There's something about the childhood mindset that doesn't view the world, the limitations that we do as adults, you know, needing to have an income to survive, the sense of security that we're constantly seeking is provided hopefully by our family, by our parents. We have structure with our schooling, with our, you know, bedtime routines. And so our, our minds are able to be naturally curious and wandering and dreaming big. And so I think that that childhood mindset is one that we can all strive to reach back to and think without all those filters, all of those protections, and can really give us some clues into the things that we feel naturally led to do.
And so what about your childhood clues? What were some of those clues for you?
Kathy
The only thing that I can, I mean, obviously there were childhood clues in my family. That's the other thing that you should be aware of. It doesn't have to just be you. So the childhood clues in my family was that I came from a family of educators, from my father being a professor, my grandparents being principals of a school, all my aunts being teachers. And so that would be my first childhood clue that was pointing me towards education.
The other childhood clue was something that my kindergarten teacher wrote in the report card that said "Kathy is organizing all the students." That was in my kindergarten report card that the teacher was saying that. So it was pointing me towards education. I will say that I most of the listeners don't know the story. The community knows it, that I ignored those calling clues and refused to go the path of education, especially when I first went into college. I was like, I'm not going to be a teacher no matter what happens. I'm never going to do that. I came out of college with a degree, not knowing what I was going to do. My dad, who's a prin-- who knew a principal said, "oh, you don't have a job. Why don't you go to this school and start exploring, you know, being a substitute teacher?" And I really felt like it was such a natural thing for me to be in front of a classroom, fell in love with high school students, which I thought was hilarious because they were all so much taller than me, towered over me. But I could find, you know, it was a natural fit for me. Education was exactly where I had been, what I had been longing for my entire life.
Kevin
Yeah, that's that's so good. I love how you described that resistance to the clues. I think that's true of a lot of us. We get those clues and we immediately don't know how that would be possible or we would rather do something else. And I know that that was true for me too.
From a very young age, I had a sense that I was going to be a priest. I grew up Catholic and would watch the priest lead mass and felt like, "gosh, I love the idea of being an active participant in my faith." I love the idea of religion and a performative worship being a part of what I felt led to do being up in front of people teaching and leading people helping people worship feel closer to God. And so I just thought, oh, I'll be a priest. And then was resistant to that when I wasn't sure I wanted to be married and have a family and just to know what that would look like and got confused as I got older and wanted to do acting and sort of moved away from that and then found myself coming back to it again in my young adult life. So it's wild how some of those natural childhood dreams can become really profound clues for us as we try to discover our calling.
Kathy
Yeah, this is also true that our childhood holds some clues to our calling. And I love this quote that's very related to this idea of clues in general that we've been talking today from David Viscott, "the purpose of your life is to find your gift, the work of life is to develop it, and the meaning of life is to give it away.: Both you and I have found that and the joy of giving our lives away through a calling. There's nothing better than that.
Whether we have struggled, which we have financially, and some of the other pieces that we talked about today, the paycheck, the career advancement, there is no other greater purpose than to find the reason you were put on the planet and to be fulfilling that every day.
Kevin
It's always worth the struggle, the hardship, the sacrifices when you can see the faces of the people that you're serving when you know that the sacrifice is for someone and that you're giving to somebody who it will make a difference for; it's deeply meaningful and and moving when your focus is other people and giving away what what we have.
Kathy
Discovering your calling isn't about a single moment, it's about looking for the clues along the way. So we just want to encourage you today to start looking for the clues and ask others too what the clues might be in your life.
Sometimes as we're looking for the clues, the best thing we can do is just to stop and pause, listen and look and discover.
Kevin
Hmm
Kathy
And to help with that, we want to close with a guided meditation. So whatever you may be coping with today, this is for you.
Kevin
As we begin, I invite you to find a quiet space and to settle into a comfortable position. Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Feel the air fill your lungs like a gentle wave, and as you exhale, imagine any tension you have melting away, flowing out of your fingertips like golden sand drifting into the wind. With each breath, allow yourself to sink deeper into stillness, as if floating on a tranquil lake under the stars.
From this deep relaxation, a vision begins to form. A breathtaking landscape where you feel completely at peace. It could be a sun-dappled forest, a vast desert glowing underneath the setting sun, or a misty mountaintop kissed by the dawn. Listen to the whispers of nature, feel the ground beneath your feet, and breathe in the scents carried by the wind. In the distance, you see an archway, a natural tunnel woven from tree branches, cascading flowers and a shimmering rock. This passageway is a portal to deeper wisdom. Step forward and pass through. Leave behind the weight of uncertainty and step into the realm of possibility.
On the other side, a vision unfolds. You are immersed in your perfect work, the calling that ignites your soul. Are you creating, teaching, healing, leading? Simply observe. Feel the energy, the purpose, the fulfillment. Notice the details, the sights, sounds, and emotions that arise. Let the universe reveal the path before you. After a time, the tunnel calls you back. As you step through, you return to your peaceful sanctuary, holding the insights and messages you received. Sit for a moment in this space, breathing deeply and letting the knowledge settle within you, like ripples on a still pond.
Slowly bring awareness back to your body. Wiggle your fingers and toes. Feel the present moment embracing you. And when you're ready, open your eyes, carrying the wisdom of your journey with you. We encourage you to take a moment to write down the visions, emotions, or messages that have surfaced. May they be keys to your true calling, waiting to be unlocked. Amen.
